adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
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