So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
