Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Randomize