Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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