I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
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