You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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