His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Please don't give away my fajitas
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
The air taste purple.
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