you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
I just blew my weed a kiss
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
