If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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