Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
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