do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
