i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Quick, to the slutcave!
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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