So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
