Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize