You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Randomize
