how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
My vagina is very pro this idea
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
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