i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Randomize
