You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
Randomize
