The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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