And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
