Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Can I color on your dick again?
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
