he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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