i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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