My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize