I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Randomize
