do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Randomize