You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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