Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
