There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
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