she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Randomize
