Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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