i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
