Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
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