She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
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