mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
