Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Randomize
