Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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