Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Randomize
