I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I need to align my fucking chakras
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
Randomize
