sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
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