TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
then he tried to convert me to islam
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
