But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Randomize
