If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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