Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
third nipple confirmed
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
Dick very happy bro
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
