I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Randomize
