Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Randomize
