I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
I made him laugh his dick is mine
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
