wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize