Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
Randomize
