So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
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