I want to stick my p in your. b.
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
Randomize
